Meeting Etiquette: The Unwritten Rules That Everyone Notices
Here’s a truth most organisations won’t put in their policy manual. The biggest productivity killer in your workplace isn’t poor strategy. It isn’t budget constraints. It isn’t even difficult people.
It’s bad meeting behaviour. And most of it comes down to etiquette.
The Rules You Were Never Taught
Nobody hands you a guide on your first day at work that says: here’s how to behave in meetings. You’re just expected to know. And when you don’t — or when you forget — everyone in the room notices.
Arriving late. Checking your phone mid-discussion. Talking over people. Hijacking the agenda with your pet topic. These aren’t minor irritations. They’re trust-eroding habits that signal loud and clear: I’m not really here for this.
The meeting room is one of the most public stages in professional life. Every time you walk in, your leadership credibility is on show.
Before the Meeting Even Starts
Great meeting etiquette begins before you pull out the chair.
Read the agenda. Know why you’re there. If you don’t know what you really want from the meeting, you can’t communicate it. And if you haven’t prepared, you’re essentially asking everyone else to carry your load.
When you arrive, be a human being first. Small talk before the meeting isn’t a waste of time — it’s the ice-breaker. You get to know each other when the stakes are low. Don’t skip it.
Phone away. Full stop.
In the Room: The Speak Once Rule
This is one of the principles I’ve championed for decades, and it still surprises people when they first hear it.
You don’t get a second turn to speak until everyone who wants to has spoken once.
Why? Because fairness drives focus. When one or two voices dominate, you lose the wisdom in the room. The Speak Once Rule is etiquette with a governance backbone — it keeps things fair, focused, and moving forward.
Side conversations? The chair should shut them down. Politely. But firmly.
The Chair Sets the Rhythm
Think of a meeting chair like the drummer in a band. The drummer starts first. Everyone else takes their cue from the beat. If the chair is uncertain, distracted, or inconsistent, the whole meeting loses its rhythm.
Good chairing is good etiquette. Starting on time — regardless of who hasn’t arrived yet — sends a message. So does finishing on time. Running over isn’t a sign of a productive meeting. It’s a sign of poor discipline.
As JFK once said: our task is not to fix the blame for the past — it’s to fix the course for the future. Don’t waste meeting time rehashing old decisions. Move forward.
The Simple Standard
You don’t need a 20-page policy to fix meeting culture in your organisation. You need one shared standard:
Be present. Be prepared. Be respectful of everyone’s time.
Meetings are about people. When people feel heard, respected, and fairly treated, they engage. They contribute. They commit to decisions.
That’s not just good etiquette. That’s what makes meetings actually work.
David Julian Price has spent 40-plus years helping organisations run better meetings. He is a Certified Speaking Professional, Global Speaking Fellow, and author of four books on meeting procedure.
When it comes to meeting etiquette there are many nuances. The smallest things can have a major impact on how people perceive you. Whether you’re the meeting chair or a participant, knowing when and how to say the right thing can make your meetings run smoother.
- Small talk is awesome before the meeting. It’s not a waste of time. It’s the early part of the meeting ice-breaker. You get to know each other when the stakes are low, and establish a common bond. Don’t skip it.
- Know what you really want. If you don’t know that, you can’t communicate it.
- Advanced communication skills that serve you well socially, will also serve you well in meetings.
- Being natural at meeting etiquette skills means being open about what the other person wants. Being masterful means sometimes not even having to ask.
- Sometimes the best thing to do is keep quiet.
- Everyone communicates differently. Acknowledge it, learn it, master it.
- Understanding and implementing modern meeting procedures (blend of formal and informal meeting procedures) makes the meeting momentum flow better, creating better synergy.
- Elite-level meeting skills focus on the 3GN philosophy – Greatest Good for the Greatest Number. Doing this steers the group to better, more considered outcomes.
- Effective meetings don’t just happen. Respect everyone’s time by doing the work required of you so everyone’s time is well spent.
- Learn to argue as if you’re right, and to listen as if you’re wrong.
- Manage the small moments as every interaction matters. Treat people as you’d like to be treated.
- No Jerk Rule – make this rule public and lead by example. This means the meeting etiquette rules must be adhered to. Cultivating a positive workplace culture only works if everyone is on board.
- Learn how to call out inappropriate behaviour for what it is. Blowing the whistle on the perpetrator may be challenging, but it must be followed through or the No Jerk Rule fails.
- Respectfully accept if you’ve messed up can be just as tough to deal with. Learn to embrace it in a way where it’s an acknowledged and difficult conversation both ways.
- Good meeting etiquette is not just verbal. Written meeting agendas or meeting notes should be also attentively compiled.
- Small talk is awesome before the meeting. It’s not a waste of time. It’s the early part of the meeting ice-breaker. You get to know each other when the stakes are low, and establish a common bond. Don’t skip it.
How ‘the Big Switch’ from the city to the country changed Ed’s meeting structure and pace
An unexpected benefit to the restrictions Covid brought with it, was a shift of many people looking for a slower pace of life by moving to the countryside.
An article in The Australian Magazine in June 2020 – ‘Making the Leap to Regional Living’ explains the benefits of such a move, specifically in regards to more effective meetings, and improving his golf swing.
“Ed McKeiver moved from Brisbane to Mackay due to work changes with his company Aurizon. He brought a management team of 20 with him and says there is a real sense of camaraderie among them, with a roll-up-your-sleeves attitude.
McKeiver now spends far less time in meetings than he did in Brisbane, and more time managing his team and doing his actual job. Many of his meetings are now conducted through video calls, and it has somehow made them more efficient.
Ed says…”In a face-to-face meeting, everyone feels like they have to comment. Whereas with video meetings, people only comment when they have something valuable to add. The meetings are running 25% faster than they were before.”
McKeiver will probably have to move back to a capital city as his career progresses, but in the meantime he’s working on his golf swing, having not played for 15 years. On the weekends, he and his wife go bushwalking, searching for platypus in the national parks around Mackay.
“I feel like I’ve got my life back in balance,” he says.
Reduce your meeting length by working less (without compromising outputs) ABC Video Lab – Want to work Four Days a week? (8:18 mins) Since the pandemic began, research has shown that a 4-day work week is gaining popularity and momentum.
So that workers could still get their main tasks done, two areas naturally reduced, without the quality of the work being compromised. In fact, outputs either stayed the same or increased.
Email and Meetings
Result – The less you work, the more productive you become.
David Julian Price, the Master of Meetings, or Meetings Man, helps you reduce the time spent in meetings without compromising on effectiveness or efficiency.
If you want to transform your working life by managing your emails more effectively, call Jani Murphy
What satisfied clients say about David’s meeting procedures & systems
“I think David knows more about governance than the Speaker in Federal Parliament but he’s not the slightest bit boring or pompous about it. He has a clever knack for making meeting procedures engaging and simple. Not only that, but he’s also a fine speaker, entertaining, thoroughly prepared, well researched, emotionally intelligent and in touch with any audience.”
Colin Pearce – Strategic Business Messaging
“Excellent. It showed and provided me an insight into meetings that are both logical and common sense but are often either overlooked or ignored or not even considered.”
June Harris – Amercian Express
“Most useful. I hope to use this method of information and systems gained. ie Different pages for each item. How to have more control over meetings and make them run smoother.”
Ann Mahoney – Natural Resources and Environment
Very informative and stimulating, plenty of scope for change and implementing new ideas. Lots of useful tools and great suggestions. A fresh look at how to have more effective meetings.
Lyn Williams – Industry Commission
“I found the meeting to be very informative in such a short space of time. I will certainly be adopting this method in future – it looks so much easier and more efficient.”
Irene Cassoni – Dept of Health & Family Services
“Excellent course – David never lost my interest throughout the course. It was very interesting and informative.”
Jane Staniforth – Dept of Prime Minister and Cabinet
“Excellent, very informative. Offers potential for great future time saving – potential for better conduct of meetings in the future.”
Lyn Peters – Australian Institute of Sport
“Informative, revolutionary, breaking new ground and manageable to do.”
Ian Romeril – Surveyors Board
“Fast paced, interesting and informative session presenting up-to-date and useful information.”
Annette Taylor – Dept of Natural Resources & Environment
“David Price was an informative and also very entertaining presenter. A very refreshing change.”
Angela Duke – The Royal Victorian Eye and Ear Hospital
“Extremely beneficial. I’ll definitely use the tools provided. It will make a mundane task far more enjoyable.”
Greg Mountjoy – Bicentennial Park Trust
Meeting Ground Rules
ATTENDEES
Working together to make every meeting run like a well-oiled machine:
- We meet to decide, and encourage you to actively contribute to the discussion with your considered opinions.
- Only items on the agenda will be discussed (Exception – at the Chair’s discretion an urgent item may be added. More details are in the Ground Rules for the Chair).
- Please arrive 2 minutes beforehand, ready to participate and start on time.
- Items already discussed on the agenda will not be repeated if you’re late.
- Except for quick stand-up meetings, every meeting will have a written agenda.
- Agendas will be sent out 2 days in advance for everyone to review and prepare.
- Meetings will focus on decision making, not information sharing.
- By doing the required reading or tasks beforehand, you are respecting not only your time but all attendees.
- We ask you to respectfully listen to your work colleagues’ views, and not interrupt them. It is the Chair’s role to control the meeting.
- No mobile phones in the meeting room. Except in special situations agreed to by the meeting.
- The “speak once rule” is in place to encourage fair discussion. You won’t be given the opportunity to speak a second time until everyone who wishes to, has spoken once.
- Information items will be restricted to items that cannot be dealt with directly or by email, or items that other people must know about in order to do their job.
- Preparation of agenda items – For large appendages, please ensure all pages are numbered, allowing for time-efficient viewing and understanding of the issue and recommendation/s to be discussed.
Virtual WFH meetings
- Have a cat or dog in the background. 100% engagement guaranteed – yes we’re serious.
- Cameras will be on throughout the meeting so we can see the cat or dog.
- Each person will mute themselves unless speaking or the pets wish to contribute.